Alright, so Doug McMillon's calling it quits at Walmart. Retiring at 59? Yeah, something smells fishy about that. You don't just walk away from a Fortune 500 company after a decade, especially when the stock's quadrupled. Unless... you see something the rest of us don't.
The McMillon Legacy: Smoke and Mirrors?
Let's be real, the guy steered Walmart through some choppy waters – a pandemic, the e-commerce apocalypse, and enough inflation to make your head spin. And yeah, U.S. revenue went up. But at what cost? Did that growth actually, you know, benefit anyone besides shareholders? Because I'm seeing a lot of "market share nabbed from Target and Kroger" which translates to "Walmart squeezed the life out of its competitors."
And all that talk about raising wages? From $9 to $14? Give me a break. That's barely keeping up with inflation. It's like throwing a drowning man a pebble and expecting him to be grateful. Offcourse, they spin it like they're some kind of saintly corporation.
McMillon told Fortune he wanted Walmart's "reputation to match the reality." Translation: "We know we're seen as an evil empire, but we're trying to convince you we're not that evil."
Enter John Furner: The AI Whisperer?
So, who's stepping into the CEO hot seat? John Furner. Mr. "I'm gonna keep the same number of employees even as we grow." Which, let's be clear, means fewer humans doing more work, thanks to our glorious AI overlords.

He even brags about some dude who used to drive trucks now leading a "team of bot techs." Oh, how inspiring. We're extending people's careers... by turning them into glorified babysitters for robots. Attrition rates are low? Maybe because people are too scared to quit in this economy.
And then there's this whole "sustainability" push. Reaching their emissions goal six years early? Color me skeptical. I'd bet my last dollar they just changed the way they measure things to make themselves look good. It's the oldest trick in the corporate greenwashing playbook. And honestly...
Wait, am I being too harsh? Maybe McMillon genuinely wants to spend his golden years golfing and sipping margaritas. Maybe Furner really does have a plan to make AI work for everyone, not just the C-suite. Maybe pigs will fly.
The Real Reason He's Bailing
Here's what I think is really going on: McMillon saw the writing on the wall. He knew that the next decade is going to be even tougher than the last. Amazon's breathing down Walmart's neck, AI is about to disrupt the entire retail landscape, and consumers are getting pickier and poorer by the minute.
He got out while the getting was good, leaving Furner to deal with the fallout. It's like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, except the Titanic is a mega-corporation that's too big to fail. Or is it?
He Saw the Abyss Staring Back
Honestly, I think McMillon's a rat deserting a sinking ship. He saw the future, and it ain't pretty. Furner can talk about "extending careers" all he wants, but the robots are coming for our jobs, and Walmart's gonna be ground zero.
